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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

The worst Lenten sacrifice ever

 photo Facebook lent_zpsp6sgolth.jpg


This year I made my worst Lenten sacrifice ever. No, I didn't give up chocolate or Diet Coke...that's child's play. This is even worse than when I gave up sitting on my couch. This year I gave up Facebook and I am struggling, people.

I know that lamenting here about the sacrifice makes me a Pharisee who walks around in ashes and cloth asking for attention. I promise this is a one-time only whine because holeeeeey smokes, what have I done?!

I've been nudged to give up Facebook for Lent by a good friend for a few years. A couple of times I tried to dictate one day of the week during Lent would be Facebook-free. I called it "Holy Thursdays." Let's just say I had minimal success with that. 

A few weeks ago, I got this urge from inside that I should give up Facebook for Lent. I ignored it. Then some friends started saying they might do it too. I let the idea rise to the surface of my brain again. But I just didn't know. Finally, on Fat Tuesday, I just decided to go Facebookless or go home. I hastily wrote a "see ya after Easter" note on my 4th Frog Facebook page and my personal timeline. Then I handed Annie my laptop and told her to change my password. 

Wow. This is hard. It hasn't even been a week yet, but I feel so isolated. I can't tell you how many times I want to shoot a quick message to someone, only I can't because I don't have their email address or phone number. I'm just connected via Facebook.

I wonder how certain friends are doing and what new fun my group of blogging friends is up to. And my Catholic moms group is no longer just a keyboard away when I want to share a prayer request or tell them that Robbie decided for this Lent he is going to start listening to the homily.  

Of course, I could give up this giving up of Facebook. I could say it's too hard. To which my mother would reply "Do you think Jesus thought it was too hard to climb up on that cross and die for you?" But I am determined, at least for today, to persist. 

It's the community that I miss on Facebook. Ok, and some of the "which color M&M are you" Buzzfeed quizzes. I've attempted to find community among the tweeps on Twitter. I'm not new there, but it's just not Facebook. In my experience, tweeting is like farting in the wind...you never really know if anyone realized you did it (or tweeted it in this case) before the wind takes it away unless someone says something. I can count on one hand the number of times a Facebook post went unanswered or at least unliked. (So, I might be supposed to learn something about humility I suppose.)

My resolve is strong because Annie changed my password so I don't have a choice I truly believe this was a message from my heart. I consider this first week the detox phase. I've spent the time trying to fill the void with Twitter and Words with Friends, you know, just until the shakes pass. Now I feel myself ready to move into the purpose of this Lenten sacrifice, to seek what I'm supposed to find in this digital isolation. I have some books to read, some letters to write, and yes some praying to do. 

Can I make it five more weeks without Facebook? I'm going to try. But I'm pretty sure that on Easter morning the first thing I'm going to do after I snatch the Reese's eggs from my basket before Mike can get to them is to have Annie log me back into Facebook for my own resurrection of sorts. 

5 comments:

Christine Exline said...

Praying for strength. Sacrifice is hard. Not that I am endorsing giving up your Lenten sacrifice, but in my morning devotion I was struck with this message "We come to Christ with empty buckets — whether we admit it or not. So let’s not bring our self improvements and call them sacrifices. Let’s don’t use our efforts as currency to buy the free grace we’ve been given.
Let’s simply come to the cross of Christ — again, today.
Let’s come empty. He will fill us." It is from http://shereadstruth.com/2015/02/24/come-empty/

kimybeee said...

I am not near as nice about this as Christine. I don't like it and I miss you!! I got a new puppy the day after you left and you aren't on FB to gush over how adorable she is!! I miss your funny one liners and your pokes at mike!!

But I can respect your decision because of God, but I still miss you!!

Amy said...

Thank you both. I've made it how long now? I guess the fact that I'm not counting days is progress.

Christine - I think my giving up of Facebook is a way for me to empty my buckets so that I can approach Christ with plenty of room to receive what he will have for me.

Kim -- I miss you and several others, too. One thing I've learned is that for all its faults and time suckiness, Facebook is a blessing that gathers people together who might not otherwise be in each others lives.

Cindy said...

Not gonna lie....miss you like crazy but admire your strength

kimybeee said...

I agree. I was just a few seconds away one day from deleting my FB. You and two other people o have never "met" actually kept me from doing it. I try to avoid getting time sucked into the Internet, but I am home alone a lot. And tv sucks lol. Jeff and I watch dvr'd shows together.