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Tuesday, March 8, 2016

My 40-something flat tire

I'm stuck and I'm not sure which way to go or if not moving at all is the right answer. I'm not sad or depressed or anxious. Well, maybe a little bit anxious. But I've got these things that I wish were different, things that pretty much only I can make different, but I can't seem to make any movement toward any of them. I'm just stuck.

I think it goes back to my existence as a messy perfectionist. Or it might have to do with the fact that I'm a great idea person, but am not so swift at the details.

 photo Flat tire_zps2jub7plf.jpgI would call this state of standstill a midlife crisis but a.) it doesn't feel like an actual crisis (thank God!) and 2.) midlife crisis sounds so cliche.

It's more like a 40-something flat tire. Annoying. Inconvenient. Fixable.

There are two things I can think to do in my current stuck-ed-ness.

First, pray. It's always the right answer and should always be my first answer, but it isn't. But I'm thankful that when I think about where I am and where I want to be and how I have no idea how to connect the two, the thought of prayer rises to my consciousness.

Second, write. Writing here, yes. But also, I know that if I sit down to just right about where I am stuck, why I feel stuck and what I could do differently, writing it all out just for myself, that some clarity will rise to the surface.

Pray. Write. Move. Maybe once I spend some solid time doing the first two things, the third will come along as a natural consequence.

What do you do when you're stuck?


Nancy said...

Praying helps me as well. I find that I am able to move ahead when I have a clear mind, which praying give me. Good luck fixing your "flat". I will be praying with you!