Last week I broke a tooth -- or broke off a filling that was on the tooth, I'm not quite sure which -- and it's all my mom's fault.
I broke the tooth when I was chewing on ice.
I was chewing on ice because I'm anemic.
I'm anemic because I take Nexium, which inhibits iron absorption.
I take Nexium for esophagus-searing acid reflux. Seriously, I'd give up the internet before I gave up my Nexium.
I get my esophagus-searing acid reflux from my mother. Not that she gives me heartburn. I mean that her genes cursed my esophagus. My brother's too.
And that is why it's my mother's fault that I broke my tooth.
Unless you want to argue it's bad teeth. Those are my dad's fault.