- If there is a business that never seems to have any customers, yet has been in business for a really long time, it's probably a front for drugs.
- When I don't want to go to church, I just have to ask myself "Do you think Jesus wanted to climb up on that cross and die for you?"
- Almost anything can be fixed with a paper clip and a rubber band.
- When beginning a test, say a quick prayer to St. John Chrysostom. Apparently he is the patron saint of smart people.
- I'm not going to be happy until somebody ends up crying.
- When I can make a free throw while holding a bag of groceries in one hand, I will belong to the "cool mom" group.
- Real moms buy sandwich bags that fold over, not zip; orange juice concentrate; and Nestle Quik.
- If you see some cute home decor at the store, don't bother buying it because you can just make it yourself. You probably won't get around to making it, but you could.
- Should the need arise, Serenity brand protection is the best for a leaky bladder.
- If your kid says his arm is broken, it probably is. However, you can wait a day or two to have it checked out just to be sure.
Get your tickets today! (Really -- prices go up on April 15.)
You can read what some of my fellow cast members have learned from their mothers too:
Hillary at Midwest Berliners
Robyn at Hollow Tree Ventures