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Sunday, April 1, 2012

The Liar's Club

The sight of my bandaged hand seems to invite a lot of concerned and curious inquiries as to what happened to me. The answer -- carpal tunnel surgery -- is kind of boring and getting a little monotonous. So I thought maybe I should come up with some answers that are a little more colorful and interesting.

See how these grab you.

  1. Someone tried to take the last Diet Coke, so I punched him.
  2. We were at the zoo and I got too close to the tiger cage just before feeding time.
  3. I'm wrapping my hand right hand in solidarity with the lefties of the world.
  4. I was high-fiving Robbie. The kid doesn't know his own strength.
  5. Tattoo gone wrong.
  6. My kids aren't buying "Mommy's legs are broken" anymore.
  7. It's an old Facebook injury.
  8. It's a new diet technique. Everything I put on the fork or spoon falls off.
  9. I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.
  10. Oh nothing. I just like the attention.
Do you have any others that I should add to my repertoire?


Jen Crutchfield said...

Are you just rotating through them? Because I kind of like them all.

Beth Zimmerman said...

I like them all but I'm especially partial to #7. You could tweak it to include injures caused by twitter or texting too!

kimybeee said...

i wanted to see if this bandage would make my hand look fat? lol lol

or i get paid $5.00 everytime somebody asks me what happened and I give them my doctors name. my first surgery is paid for and the second about half already lol

Ellen aka Ellie said...

I love #4!

But tell the truth young lady...


Mrs4444 said...

LOL! These are great. Hm...How about "I'm faking an injury for an insurance claim--Thanks for helping me along with your sympathy; the cameras could be anywhere."