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Thursday, December 26, 2013

The love child with the funny name

Sing with me...

"On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me..."

 photo 1C5AFCC3-BC39-41BA-B787-0FC24593EE14_zpswwpvyoy7.jpgA vintage-real-life-never-out-of-the-box-signature-on-her-bum-birth-certificate-included-Cabbage-Patch-Kid!

She was a little delayed on arrival, but given that she's been in a box since 1985, I'll cut her a break for not knowing about GPS.

The box came just as we were leaving for Charlie's basketball game. It was big, but light. I didn't have a sense of what was in it, but Mike was happy it had made it. So when we came home from the basketball game, we all sat in the family room as I opened the box. I'll admit to getting a little teary when I saw the yellow cardboard packaging with the chubby leafy baby logo.

Mike said he had tried to buy a doll with red pigtails, like the one my sister had, but I'm glad he didn't get that one. All those years ago, in the year without a Cabbage Patch Kid, I didn't want my sister's doll. I wanted my own. And now I have her.

She came, still affixed to the packaging with twisty wire, her birth certificate still glued to the cardboard next to her.

Her name: Elna Fanny.

Elna, which means "sun ray."

Fanny, which means, well, duh. Fanny, bum, bucket, buttocks.

My very own Cabbage Patch Kid and her name means, loosely translated of course, "sun shines out her arse!"

I wasted no time in opening the box. This is no collector's item doll. This is my doll. And I will love her and hug her and squeeze her...sorry to go John Steinbeck for a moment.

Anyway, it is pretty funny how maternal I felt toward Elna Fanny as soon as I freed her from her box. Even after 28 years encased in cardboard and cellophane (imagine the bedhead!), she has that baby powdery smell that I remember Cabbage Patch Kids having. Her birth certificate came with a form to fill out so I can send away for an official certificate suitable for framing, though I have a feeling that's a piece of mail that would go unanswered these days.

 photo F14671B8-ACA5-48E9-BB3E-3E99F5DBAA6F_zps95bydfsp.jpgI sat on the couch with her and smelled her chubby cheeks, finding myself talking in baby talk and allowing my mind to wander a bit about how it might be to have a REAL baby in the house again. Then I remembered real babies don't always smell like powder and they are not often content to sit in one place for 28 minutes, let alone years.

So, I thanked Mike with a kiss, and took Elna Fanny -- it's a must to use both names -- upstairs to bed with me. Oh, no worries. No co-sleeping here. She is tucked into her own call-it-a-bassinet-but-its-really-a-laundry-basket next to my bed, that just happened to be there in a handy spot.

She'll probably hang out in my room most of the time. Some days, maybe I'll pick her up just to smell her powdery sweetness. I might peek at her bum just to see the "real" Xavier Roberts signature again. And sometimes I'll just smile at the thought that Elna Fanny is the love child of my childhood dreams and my husband's desire to make them to come true.


Cherie from the Queen of Free said...

Totally crying! YAY. And double yay that it was from the specific year. Way to go Mike! I wouldn't have thought of that & you would have just got a recent one if it was me. :) So excited for you. Merry Christmas!

Jaime said...

I just love this!!! Great job Mike. I'll admit to being a bit teary too.

Eternal Lizdom said...

That is a good man you've got there. I hope you squeeze on him a bunch!!

Anonymous said...

Too sweet! I had one named Honey Sue with red braid-tails and a tennis outfit (because I'm SO athletic), but my grandparents managed to find my older sister (17 at the time) a preemie with her name: Zara. What are the odds?! I'm so glad you have your little lovie!

Mike Magan said...

Seeing her open it was totally worth it. It was a laugh/cry response that came from deep down. I thought she would get a kick out of it, but she really bonded with it instantly.

Deb Reale said...

Best Christmas gift from loving spouse ever? I think so! You are right- she's a love child. I know you'll give thanks, give hugs, and enjoy the gift of your own Cabbage Patch kiddo. Sweet!

kimybeee said...

How sweet!