The year without a Cabbage Patch Kid

The year was 1983. The hottest Christmas toy -- Cabbage Patch Kids -- were flying off the shelves and leaving parents all over scrambling to put one under the Christmas tree. I was 13, probably too old for dolls. I don't recall wanting a Cabbage Patch…that is until I didn't get one.

Christmas morning, my three siblings and I sat at the top of the stairs, waiting, as we did every year, for my dad to go downstairs to check if Santa had come. He made his way downstairs, started the coffee, and declared that we were up much too early, that Santa had not arrived yet.

We all hollered our objections and tore down the stairs into the living room, which we only really used for Christmas and for sitting in the green chair when we were in trouble. There, under the tree, was a so-ugly-it-was-cute, orange yarn-haired, chubby faced doll peeking out from behind a cellophane window. The doll's birth certificate showed through the window, proclaiming her name to be -- well, I don't remember what her name was, probably because I was distracted by another name on the box:

To Shelley. Love Santa.

This doll wasn't for me. She was for my 10-year old sister.  A wave of disappointment swept over me. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I caught sight of another figure.

This one was a doll, too. She had a similar round face with wide eyes, though hers were brown, not blue. Similar, but there was something just a little off. Instead of two pigtails, this doll had dark brown hair pulled back into one pony tail.

She was just sitting by herself under the tree. No box. No birth certificate announcing her name. The only paper this doll came with was a sticker on her ugly white and seafoam green pajamas.

To Amy. Love Santa.

Santa had left me a fake doll. Of course by this time, I knew the truth about Santa, so I knew that my mother, my very own mother, had thrown me under the cabbage bus and left me with an inauthentic version of the best toy of Christmas.

I don't remember my reaction. I hope I was gracious, but I'm sure my disappointment showed. There was my sister playing with her real deal doll, straight from the Cabbage Patch, while I was left holding a square-bodied imposter that did not have Xavier Roberts' signature on its butt.

Looking back as an adult, I can appreciate that my mom took the time to actually make my doll. Sure, she may have risked bodily harm to snag my sister's authentic Cabbage Patch Kid, but she gave up hours of her own time to make mine. I think that doll, whose name I don't remember either, is still in my parent's basement.

I laugh about it now and tell the story to point out how my sister was always the most favored child. I have an appreciation of stretching the Christmas budget and trying to make the kids happy without breaking the bank. Yet somehow, there is still a sting in the memory of the year without a Cabbage Patch Kid.

Earlier this week, I was at #PLAYIndy, hosted by Indy With Kids. There was a Cabbage Patch doll there available for winning. I held out a secret hope that my name would be called. That I would be the one to walk away with the real deal doll.

I'm not sure what I would have done with the doll if I'd won it. Perhaps I would have donated it to the Giving Tree at church. Maybe I would have sold it on the Facebook garage sales. But just maybe, I would have brought her home, taken her out of the box and enjoyed my very own Cabbage Patch Kid.

The Biggest Loser: As Annie sees it

This Biggest Loser wrap-up is courtesy of guest blogger Annie from Fairies 'n' Firecrackers.

The show started with a pop challenge. Alli announced that the weigh-in would be a little different this time and there would be two lines. The usual yellow line with two people under it and a lower red line with one person below it. The person under the red line will go home automatically. They’ll vote on the yellow line, so two people will go home this week. There’s never been a red line. Bob said, “A red line…what the hell?!” I thought that, too! Jillian pulled Bob aside and said that Shay needs to be here. Jillian doesn’t think that Shay is going to do well and is concerned that she’ll go home and fail. What is up with Bob and Amanda?! Why is he worried about her so much? Weird.

Commercial break. I'm hungry and haven't had dinner yet. Hubby is in charge of that tonight.

Danny seems worried about that red line, big time. People are falling over at the gym. Danny doesn’t feel great. He’s hurting and “feels dead”. Let’s hope not. Jillian kicked him out of the gym because he’s over-trained. Dr. Phillian is with Shay on the stairs. Man she’s working her! She really feels that Shay needs another week!

Commercial break. Trainer tip: Monitor your caloric intake of liquids. A 20 oz bottle of fruit juice is how many servings? Answer: 2 ½! That's 30-40 grams of sugar per serving, more than a can of soda!

The “old” folks are teaming up. Rudy, Allen, Danny and Liz. They’re afraid that the younger ones will quickly vote one of them off. Rebecca is quitting according to Jillian. Jillian tells her that all she has is this very moment. Rebecca is in tears with Amanda in their room. “I need this to be the week that I figure it out." She hasn’t figured it out yet?! Come on! Jillian pulls Shay and Amanda out of the gym to see where their heads are. Jillian says, "24 hour fitness" three times in one sentence.

Commercial break. Man, this Papa John’s pizza is good. That’s right, I’m eating pizza while watching The Biggest Loser. My husband ordered it for dinner. It’s good!

The contestants are at a circus for their challenge. What are they doing at a circus for their challenge? Hoops are being lowered. Trampolines, hoops, and mats. Jump through your opponents hoop, every time you do, they get one point. 100 points = you’re out. Last one standing wins. Prize is immunity! Whoa. 8people, two are going home, that leaves only 6 and one gets immunity. This is big, folks! Looks like Liz is getting hit by the young kids. The big guys are going after Amanda. Shay is struggling to get herself through the hoops. Liz is out. Amanda is next. Who’s next? Daniel is out. Big guys are against Rebecca next. Kids are against Allen, he’s out. Now it is Danny and Rudy against Rebecca. She’s out. Shay, Rudy, and Danny are left. Rudy and Shay area fighting because she made an alliance with her at the start of the challenge and now he's trying to get her out with Danny. Shay is out. Danny vs. Rudy. Danny has 77, Rudy has only 5. Danny is out. Rudy wins immunity, no red line for him. Back to campus and Daniel, Shay, Amanda and Rebecca stole bikes out of the gym and they’re working out in Shay’s bedroom while the others sleep at night. That's crazy!

Commercial break. The Blind Sidemovie just previewed. That looks really good!

Product placement with Bob, Liz and Danny. Larabars in the cherry pie flavor which are made solely of almonds, dates, and unsweetened cherries. Time for the last chance workout with Bob. He took them off campus and went to some place full of trapeze bars. Bob talks to Shay about how much she needs to be here. These trapeze bars are kind of wonky, but cool at the same time. Looks like a great work-out.

Commercial break again. That wasn’t long.

Jillian gives them all a last-chance work-out at the campus gym. She works each of them hard! There’s the moon... must be time to weigh-in. Ever notice that they always show the moon at this point in the show? Creepy. Let’s see how they did!

Rudy goes first: previous 332 current: 324 -8 this week
Next is Shay starting 476, previous 393, current:

Commercial break! Darn it, why do they do that?!

Shay’s current weight: 376 -17 pounds!!!!! She just lost a total of 100 pounds in 9 weeks!! 4.33%! WOW!
Amanda 250 starting. Previous 207 current: 202 -5 pounds this week. 2.42%
Rebecca starting: 279 previous 219 current: 209 -10 this week. 4.57% that puts her in first place
Danny is next starting: 430 previous 333 current:

Another commercial. Ugh

Danny’s current weight: 316 -17 pounds, he just lost 100 in 9 weeks too! Wow. 114, to be exact.That’s amazing! 5.11% puts him in first place.

Three people left.

Allen has a one pound advantage. He won it during the pop challenge. 325 starting, previous, 253. Current: 243 -10 pounds. 4.35% with the one pound advantage.
Liz is up. 276 starting, previous 218 current: 206 -12 pounds. She looks thin this week. Good for her! 5.50% puts her in first place.
Shay is now below the yellow line by .02%
Daniel is last. Starting weight: 454 previous 261, current:

Go figure…another commercial!

Daniel’s current weight is: 256 -5 pounds which puts 1.92% and under the red line. He’s going home….again.

Shay and Amanda are below the yellow line together. Bob’s worst night-mare? The others have an hour to decide, as usual. Shay is fighting for her life and wants to stay. Amanda is fighting, too. They both want it and are showing it. I’d much rather see that than the usual “oh send me, they need it more” crap that we’ve seen the last few weeks. I know who I’d be voting for. Let’s see who gets sent home.

Rebecca goes first. She voted for, Shay.
Allen voted for Shay as well.

What the heck people?!

Danny is next. He voted for Amanda.
Liz is next. She’s playing the game…..and votes for Amanda. Surprise, surprise!
2 votes for each of them. It is up to Rudy.

Commercial break!

Rudy votes for Shay.
Shay lost 100 pounds in 9 weeks. She set a record and she’s going home. Her goal is to lose 213 pounds by December for the finale and beat that record, too. They didn't show her "now", just her home-coming 24 hours after she got voted off.

Daniel has lost 215 pounds in a year. He visited David, who he started the biggest loser with him last season. David said that weight-loss isn’t a priority right now and feels healthy. Daniel tells him that he's there for him whenever he decides to lose the weight. The end of the show said that Daniel has a girlfriend who he hopes to introduce to America at the finale. (do I smell a proposal?)

Make-over week next week!!! So fun!

Thanks so much, Annie! I was awake for the show (and definitely awake by the wretched end!), but in no condition to do a write up. I'll just add that I am so disappointed that Shay was voted off that I'm tempted to stop watching the show.

I'm not surprised that Rebecca and Rudy voted for Shay. But Allan? He's a Hoosier and we have more decency than that. The only contestant I'm not totally turned off by now is Danny. Guess he's my new favorite. Sigh...

To end on a good note, both Danny and Shay were on the Jay Leno show right after TBL. He has lost 230 pounds; she's lost 150. They both look great!

Earning an F

The other day Chris wrote at Notes from the Trenches about little ways she fails her kids. This morning, I'm really feeling like I'm failing mine -- Charlie especially -- in big ways.

I got an e-mail from Charlie's teacher yesterday that he'd had missing assignments two days in a row. I wasn't aware there was homework he didn't do because I didn't check his assignment notebook. I asked him if he finished his homework. He said yes.

Now, I knew in my mind that I needed to double check. To have him show me the work. But I took him at his word because I was too tired (read: lazy) to check. When I looked at his assignment notebook this morning (yes, about 12 hours too late), I saw that he has two tests today. I asked if he studied for them at after care yesterday. I got a blank stare in return.

He didn't even bring his reading book home, so he's on his own for that test. We went over the spelling words several times. As we were doing so, I realized this was the first time that I've seen the list all week.

I reached into his backpack and came up with handfuls of old crumpled papers. His desk at school is the same way. And why wouldn't they be? That's the way I am. Every time a teacher writes in a report card that one of my children needs to be more organized, it's a personal conviction against my character because they are not learning organization at home.

I feel like I'm failing him because I haven't been able to make him see that school is his most important job, probably because by my inattention, I'm giving him the message that it's not.

It goes beyond school. He wanted a short-sleeve shirt to wear today, but I haven't washed them. He's gone for two weeks without his medication because I lost the Rx. (See above re: organization. Found the Rx last night.) He and Robbie are taking their lunches wrapped in enough foil to tune in the TV on the international space station because I'm out of Ziploc bags. And the contents of their lunch are lean because our pantry and fridge are void of most things beside condiments.

Oh, and to add insult to injury, I just realized that he is singing in the choir at church this morning -- Mass started 20 minutes ago -- and I'm not there. If I wasn't trying to keep this a rated PG blog, I'd spew a string of expletives right here.

This is definitely one of those mornings where I'm ready to move to a hillside in Kentucky.

Biggest Loser: Black vs. Blue

Tonight on the Biggest Loser was the night that the teams were split into Black (Jillian's team) and Blue (Bob's team).

Tara won the "up-down" challenge for the green team, so they got to choose their trainer; they chose to stay with Jillian. Helen (pink team) finished last, so she was forced to switch trainers and ended up with Jillian. The rest of the players were assigned to teams based on a black/blue coin toss. Although interestingly, they just happened to have exactly the right size shirt in the right color waiting for each person. Hmmm...

So the new line-up is:

Bob's Blue Team:
Kristin
Cathy
Ron
Mandi
Aubrey
Dane

Jillian's Black Team:
Tara
Lauren
Mike
Sione
Filipe
Helen

There was plenty of disappointment to go around, but the most disappointing reaction was Bob's. I think he did both his former team and his new team a huge disservice by boohooing about how upset he was. He should have put on a strong face and embraced the new opportunity, helping the players do the same.

The second challenge was a 24-hour bike challenge. Tara really showed her street smarts by gathering the things that the black team would need to get the challenge done. Their strategy of 30 minutes on the bike, 2-1/2 hours off proved to be a winning one.

My favorite quote of the night was an exchange between Aubrey and Mandi during the 24-hour challenge:

Aubrey: "My a$$ is burning."
Mandi: “Uh huh. Don’t worry -- it will go numb.”

When the Blue team came and offered a cease-fire to conserve everyone's strength for the last chance workout, I thought the Black team would take it. But kudos to Sione who said no, he was there to finish what he started. Then Aubrey from the Blue team agreed and they all finished.

Dane was absolutely right when he said that they had all gotten there (fat enough to be on TBL) by not finishing what they started in terms of weight loss plans. I thought it was a high point for everyone still in the game.

Last chance workout with the new teams and the weigh-in are tomorrow night. I think someone on Bob's team is going home simply because he's not focused on pushing them as hard as they can go. What do you think?

On being a good sport

Volleyball tryouts were last week and Annie was hoping to make the "A" team, where most of her friends would likely be assigned. I knew that the "A" team was a stretch, so I tried to hedge her bets by reminding her that lots of girls went out and only so many girls could be assigned to the "A" team.

We got an e-mail today letting us know that she did not make the "A" team, or even the "B" team, but has been placed on the "C" team. The majority of players on that team are 5th graders, with Annie and two other 6th graders rounding out the roster. She was crushed.

"Mom, I'm so embarrassed! I don't want to play on the "C" team! I don't want to play at all," she literally cried.

I tried to console her with such logical statements as "You have a real chance to be a leader on the "C" team because you're one of the 6th graders" and "You might make some new friends with some of the 5th graders you don't know."

But what I wanted to do was stomp my feet and beat my fists and rant about how "they" didn't know what they were doing when they put her on the "C" team. I wanted to theorize that her glasses are loose and in need of repair and she was inhibited by that. I wanted to tell her that of course she can quit and I totally understand why she wouldn't want to waste her time on the "C" team.

But I didn't. Because while all of those things might have made her -- and me -- feel better at the moment, none of those things would give her the benefit of using this trial to make her a stronger, better person.

I know how she feels, though. I was cut from my fair share of teams -- two soccer and a basketball team, if I remember correctly. I remember the feelings of embarrassment, of not feeling good enough, of being shut out of somewhere I desperately wanted to fit in. I still curse the name of Matt Money who cut me from the freshman and senior high school soccer teams. But I was the kid and not the mother, which makes this all the harder.

However, I have to remind myself, she was not cut. She has a spot on a team. Not the team she wanted. But a team where she does have a chance to learn and grow and contribute. And so I'll drive back and forth to practices, go to every game, cheer her on as though her name is Misty May and the musty CYO gym is a sandy volleyball pit in Beijing.

I will be a good sport and show her how to be one as well. (And when she's not looking, I just might stick my tongue out at the bozos who put her on the "C" team.)