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Friday, October 3, 2008

Wedding Vows: A Reality Check

It may not be June or February, but love is in the air around here. Tomorrow, we're headed to Cincinnati for my cousin's wedding. Next Thursday, Mike and I will celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary. Our friends Denise (of Adventures in Painting fame) and Jim just celebrated their 15th yesterday.

So I find myself reminiscing about my wedding, pausing to recall the vows we made:

I, Amy, take you, Mike, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.

And vice versa.

And I wonder what those vows would be if we stood before family and friends today and pledged our love to each other. I think they would go something like this:

I, Amy, take you, Mike, to be my husband. I promise:
  • to try to always park left of center in the driveway
  • to not act disappointed when you come home from the Red Box with "Iron Man" instead of "Made of Honor"
  • to pretend like I really care that the Cubs have lost two in a row at home in their first chance in 100 years to go to the World Series
  • to not try to pass off macaroni-n-cheese as dinner (very often)
  • to try not to roll my eyes when you tell me you can't get out of bed because you have a cold -- or to at least turn my back before rolling them
  • to encourage you to "have some fruit" when you say you're hungry and want to order a pizza
  • to let you sit around in your boxers and watch Serenity once in a while
  • to immediately dial 911 when the day comes that you have a stroke hollering at some idiotic call/amazing play in a Colts game
I, Mike, take you, Amy, to be my wife. I promise:
  • to believe you when you say you need a new pair of shoes, even though you have 17 pairs in your closet right now
  • to fill your gas tank when I see it getting low because I know you don't like to do it
  • to not sigh in frustration (too loudly) when you complain that the computer is broken, when really it just needed to be plugged in
  • to not smother you with the pillow even though your snoring could wake the dead
  • to suggest that we skip dessert, and then to not say anything when you order it anway
  • to go to the store for feminine supplies, even if it does cause me to lose my man card
  • to put up with your online Scrabble addiction, er, hobby
  • to upload your pictures, download your songs and in whatever other ways possible to be your own personal "Geek Squad."
Now that's love.

What would be included in your "reality vows?"


Mike Magan said...

my favorite of all very clever and funny

Stephanie said...

I love the Serenity vow. That should definitely be included in our vows! Jake loves that show. I would have to include in ours:

I, Stephanie, promise to not get mad when you ask me where your items (keys, hats, ipod) are in the house. Even though I do not have any idea where they could be located because they are YOUR items.

Nate's Mom said...

Loved this. I may have to borrow this, since Valentine's Day is right around the corner.

Sheri in CA