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Saturday, April 4, 2009

Mountain reflections

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Now that the oxygen has fully returned to my brain -- it only took about 48 hours -- I have some more thoughts about our Stone Mountain hike that didn't make it in to my original post.

First of all, you know those certificates that I was so excited for the the kids to get so they could show their friends at school that they did indeed climb a mountain? Yeah -- I was in such an altered state, i.e., struggling to regain my breath, that we forgot to get them once we reached the top. I do have a penny that we made in one of those penny press machines. It says "I climbed Stone Mountain!" and shows a fit-looking guy. Funny, there was not one that pictured a short, apple-shaped woman.

Second, if you recall, we took a picture of the kids at the base of the mountain. They were standing in front of a sign that listed rules and guidelines to consider before making the climb.

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Maybe I should have read those before starting our ascent. They are too hard to make out in that picture, so let me help you:

GUIDELINES FOR HEALTH & SAFETY WHEN CLIMBING STONE MOUNTAIN:
  1. If you have ever considered applying to be a contestant on NBC's The Biggest Loser, you might want to re-think climbing this mountain.
  2. If bending over to tie your shoes leaves you a little breathless, this might not be the activity for you.
  3. If your idea of exercise is going to the freezer for seconds on ice cream, consider riding the Sky Tram to the top of Stone Mountain.
  4. If the last time you climbed this mountain was as a child and you remember it being easy, take some time to consider the difference in your physical stamina then and now.
  5. If you take any type of medication for mood disorders, your desire to climb this mountain may be a symptom of your general craziness or other mental instability. You should turn back now and call your doctor for an increased dose of medication.

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